Mill Creek Review #2: Kong Island

There are some tropes, or clichés that you can tell are going to happen before a movie ever really begins. Thus is the case with the 1968 Italian movie Kong Island.

I am going to say this right off the bat. This is one boring movie. Not so much that nothing happens in it, because stuff does happen. However it is so passé, that when its done you feel like you have seen anything really.

Let’s think of the checklist of 1960’s/1950’s jungle films:

 Scanitly clad women?

Check

Man in Gorilla Costume? 

Check

 Shirtless Dude?

Check

Mad Scientest/Arrogant Poacher?

Check and Check

Plus since this is a late 60’s Italian film we have the obligatory “club” scene.

The plot concerns a group of scientists who have traveled to an island to put receptors into the brains of gorillas to use to create destructive war beasts to help them to…dare I say it, rule the world. Some scientists daughter gets captured, they encounter a savage woman on the island who also gets captured and after the brain receptors stop working the gorillas kill the most evil of the scientists.

That’s about it.

 Actually, here is the truncated version of the movie:

There, you wasted 115 seconds, I wasted 84 minutes.

The movie stars Brad Harris who pretty much made his career out of being a shirtless man. Think of him as Gerard Butler but when steroids were not quite as frowned upon.

Seriously though, you can look through Harris’s filmography and know that he is going to be shirtless in the film just by the title:

Spartacus

Goliath Against the Giants

The Fury of Hercules

79 AD

It Happened in Athens

Mystery of the Red Jungle

King of Kong

Island of Lost Girls

Three Supermen in the Jungle

Zambo, King of the Jungle

Lady Dracula- Playing Der Kommissar (uh oh)

Probably best to skip this movie, its not even good for a cheesy laugh.